Opening a sex toy website or walking into an "adult" store can be overwhelming. There are toys of every shape and size. You may find yourself asking, "who can choose just one?" It can be much easier to choose one than you might expect. The most important thing to know is what materials are safe for your body. 

When it comes to sex toys, your safety is your responsibility. The adult toy industry is largely unregulated. It is up to you to know the different options out there. 

When choosing a sex toy, it can be pretty simple. You only want non-porous material. You want to make sure that it is phthalate-free and it comes from a reputable producer. 

The phrase of note here is:

Sex toys are not created equal.

You get what you pay for. 

If you find a cheap toy, odds are you're putting your health at risk. Not to mention it's likely made using unethical labor practices. 

If you take the time to do your research. If you choose the right toy it can last for many years to come.

All products recommended are personally selected by me, Elaine S. Turner. I choose them and genuinely believe in them. However, this article may contain affiliate links. That means if you use that link to buy a product, I may earn a small affiliate commission, or tip, as I like to see it. You can learn more here if you have any questions about my affiliate policy.

What makes a good sex toy

High-quality sex toys often come with a higher price tag. This price is for many reasons that you should seriously consider. They can be a serious investment in the betterment of your sex life. 

There are many things you should look for when selecting a brand:

• Scientific testing and safety- High-quality brands employ scientists, so their toys meet specific standards. Non-toxic, safe materials should be listed on the box and the company's websites. 

• Manufacturing - Why should you care about manufacturing? This is a question about ethics. Companies such as Fun Factory meet EU labor standards. These standards mean that the people involved in creating your toy are treated fairly. Many people don't think about where toys come from. Are you comfortable experiencing pleasure at the cost of another person's well-being?

• Design - Many companies employ what they call "pleasure engineers." These people study feedback from customers, sexual anatomy, as well as what makes a product last. Those designed with the user in mind are designed to bring ecstatic pleasure. Many lower-end manufacturers will add 30+ vibration patterns. Meanwhile, they have only one button. Imagine cycling through all of those options if your favorite pattern was number 29?

• Longevity - Using high-quality means that your toy will have a long life. It may come with a warranty as well. If a product runs on disposable batteries, the odds are that it won't last long. High-quality rechargeable products can last for many years. Some companies, such as Satisfyer, offer a 15-year guarantee on all of their products. 

• Packaging - While it may not sound that important, quality companies take pride in their packaging. Quality packaging will tell you exactly what you need to know. It also demonstrates that the company takes pride in its product. If a manufacturer cares about their product, they'll brag about it on the box! You should easily find what the toy is made out of and what pleasure it offers. 

While that may sound like a lot to consider, it eliminates a lot of the noise out there. Several large companies create long-lasting, ethical, and safe products. By sticking with them you don't have to think twice about choosing their product. 

Porous vs. non-porous toys

Sex toy materials can be split into two simple categories. 

• Non-porous - This is what you're shopping for. Non-porous means that the product has a completely solid surface. Why is this important? Because you can clean and sanitize your product, the bacteria, yeast, and dirt have nowhere to hide. Because it is a solid surface, it won't be easily compromised. If stored and cared for properly, that toy should last you for many years to come.

• Porous - This is what you're trying to avoid. As the name suggests, porous toys contain millions of microscopic holes in the surface. Although it may look clean, bacteria, germs, yeast, and STIs can hide in the pores. You can never sanitize the toy. It also means that once you use it on one orifice, you can't use it in another. They also break down quickly. After even just a few uses, you may notice patches of black mold or a foul smell developing. When this happens, throw it away. It may seem inexpensive at first, but you're going to have to replace it soon.

Some toys, such as masturbators and dildos, are almost always made out of porous materials. They're made of porous materials because they are designed to feel realistic. Science has yet to discover a non-porous material that feels completely flesh-like and is affordable.

To keep yourself safe and your toy clean, use a condom.

Phthalates and sex toys

Phthalates are a cheap family of chemicals that are used to make toys bendy. They have been linked to higher rates of cervical cancer, low sperm count, and even autism in children.

Phthalates are common. You'll find phthalates in take-away containers, some children's toys, and especially in your sex toys. 

You can avoid them. Companies will put the term "phthalate-free" on the box. However, since the industry isn't regulated, it may not always be accurate. 

Stick with high-quality brands that put pride in what they create. 

A special note:

All toys that contain phthalates are porous. But, not all toys that are porous contain phthalates.

Common sex toy materials to avoid

There are countless materials you should avoid. Some of the most common are:

• Anything jelly-like - Brightly colored jelly sex toys were common in the '80s. These toys may look iconic. They contain a litany of materials you don't want in your body. These are always porous and often contain dangerous chemicals and oils.

• TPE & TPR - If you're looking for a dildo, you're going to be hard-pressed to find one that isn't made out of these materials. They're porous and impossible to sanitize. They won't always contain phthalates. So, keep your eye out for the label "phthalate-free." You should not ever use them for anal play without a condom. Because the material is porous, fecal matter will hide in those invisible pores.

• PVC - Another common material used in dildos, PVC has been known to irritate the skin. Burning and other uncomfortable effects are common complaints from usage. 

• Silicone "blends'' & SEBS - Many of these are non-toxic but still porous, which means that they hold mold and bacteria. They will break down over time. If you have one of these, use a condom and closely inspect it for dark marks, tears, and foul odors regularly. These should be replaced (at a minimum) every 10-12 months. 

• Unspecified materials - If the box doesn't tell you what it's made of specifically, then walk away. Phrases such as "body-friendly," "hygienic silicone," "high-quality materials" mean absolutely nothing. 

• Strange composites - Composites are common in masturbators. Not all blended materials are created the same. Some are relatively safe such as Fanta Flesh. However, they are porous. If it's on a vibrator box, walk away. If it's on a masturbator, use it with extreme care. Always look for the phrases "body-safe" or "phthalate-free."

Safe sex toy materials

Again, with masturbators and dildos, you'll be hard-pressed to find safe materials. However, there are many more safe options with vibrators, cock rings, and other similar toys. 

• Silicone - It must say a phrase such as "food-grade silicone," "body-safe silicone," "medical-grade silicone," "100% silicone", or "platinum cured silicone." These specific materials are non-porous and body-safe. If it just says "silicone," then it could be less than 1% silicone. 

• Glass - Glass toys get a bad reputation for no reason. They're completely solid, sturdy, non-porous, and easy to clean. Ensure that it is either borosilicate glass (popularly known as "Pyrex glass") or soda-lime glass. 

• Metal - Make sure the box is specific. You're looking for "stainless steel," "medical-grade steel," or something similar. If it's aluminum and finished with body-safe coating, you're safe as well. Metal toys are great for temperature play. They're non-porous and easy to clean. 

• Wood - Yes, it sounds strange. But there are many gorgeous, one-of-a-kind wooden sex toys available that are safe to use. Make sure the packaging specifies it has a "medical-grade finish." 
  

• ABS plastic - ABS plastic is ever so slightly porous. It is a widespread material used in toys. It's excellent at transmitting vibrations and is often only used in the handles of vibrators. It's generally safe, strong, and can last a long time. 

• Crystal & Stone - These are difficult to find, come with a high price tag, and may come from dubious labor practices. However, if they're properly sealed and made from specific stones, they're safe to use. 

How to shop for a toy in an adult store

When walking into an adult store, the quality of what they have available will vary widely. Find a reputable shop with positive reviews rather than a seedy shop full of vintage toys. 

When you enter, look around and pay attention to large product displays. 

Does the company have a complete product display?

High-quality companies often send promotional materials to draw customers to their displays. They show the brand is willing to spend money to gain your attention and trust. 

Does the brand have multiple products on display?

Quality brands often insist that stores carry their entire collection. Fringe brands may only display one or two products that are of poor quality. 

Has the toy spent its life on the shelf?

Stores keep expensive products clean, ignoring the cheap products. If it's dusty, then it isn't worth dusting.

How do the toys feel in your hand?

Silicone should feel soft and powdery to the touch. If the toy is sticky or oily, then it's low quality.

How does the display toy smell?

High-quality silicone has little to no smell. Once you wash it, it shouldn't smell at all. Low-quality toys often smell terrible, similar to nail polish or your weird uncle's closet. 

Is the spelling and grammar on the package correct?

A contentious company will spend money on a translator. Many companies care more about money than how it communicates to the customer.

Now, there is a lot more to know about materials. But if you follow the general guidelines I've listed above, you should be safe.

Just remember that you're investing in your sexual happiness and fulfilment. Treat yourself!

If you want to learn more about how to choose the perfect sex toy, contact me today!

“Sex toys have long since graduated from the floppy rubber things you hide in your bedside table to beautiful works of interactive art.”

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