Beginner's Guide to Sex Toys for Men: Your ultimate buying guide
The number of female sex toys on the market is overwhelming. Aren't men supposed to have a higher sex drive? You wouldn't be able to tell from looking at the shelves of most sex toy stores. When you finally find the small section dedicated to male pleasure, you may not know what you're looking at. That's okay! That's why I've put together this beginner's guide to sex toys for men. After reading this, you'll be confident walking into adult shops worldwide.
*Disclaimer*
I realize, appreciate, and celebrate everyone regardless of how they identify their gender. I celebrate that many people with a penis do not identify as men or male. I also celebrate those who identify as men or male and do not have a penis. This article is written explicitly for penis-focused pleasure. I am only using he/him/man/male etc., for brevity.
All products recommended are personally selected by me, Elaine S. Turner. I choose them and genuinely believe in them. However, this article may contain affiliate links. That means if you use that link to buy a product, I may earn a small affiliate commission, or tip, as I like to see it. You can learn more here if you have any questions about my affiliate policy.
Sex toy materials
No article on sex toys would be complete without discussing sex toy materials. I'm on my soapbox, and you can't knock me off it!
As we've discussed, there are both porous and non-porous sex toys.
1) Porous - These toys are made to look and feel more realistic. They contain millions of microscopic pores that are literally impossible to clean.
Bacteria, STIs, and fecal matter can hide inside these pores, waiting to ruin your day.
If you buy porous sex toys, which will likely happen, use a condom with them. It'll make cleaning up a breeze, and you won't have to worry about getting an infection.
2) Non-porous - These toys are made from specific materials that are completely solid.
There are no microscopic pores on the surface.
That means these toys can be completely sanitized and are safe to share with others.
But whenever you're looking at something that seems non-porous, double-check. You're looking for these exact phrases:
Body-safe silicone
100% silicone
Medical grade silicone
Food safe silicone
Medical grade stainless steel
100% stainless steel
Pyrex/borosilicate glass
Soda-lime glass
Ceramic with food-grade finish
When it comes to sex toys for men, you're kind of between a rock and a hard place.
Many items on the market, like masturbators, have to be made from porous materials. Only these composites can simulate the look and feel of actual human skin. Plus, materials like medical-grade silicone are incredibly firm and uncomfortable to put your dick in.
You need to pair porous items with a condom and take good care of them, so they don't deteriorate.
Certain companies like Fun Factory only use body-safe or medical grade silicone so that you have peace of mind whenever you purchase their products. They also use ethical manufacturing processes so you also know that no one is suffering for your pleasure!
Penis sex toys
These toys are designed for one of two things:
1) To provide stimulation to the penis in a sexual and pleasurable manner
2) Improve your sexual experience in some way.
Some of these will even help keep your penis harder during playtime!
So carefully consider your options before purchasing.
Sex dolls
Like everything in the world of sex toys, an overwhelming selection is available here.
On the higher-quality and more expensive end, you've got full-body sex dolls.
These are often made from silicone composites so that they feel life-like. You can even order customized sex dolls from plenty of providers so they suit your needs. From hair to breast size, they're worth the investment.
However, since they're so life-like and made from such heavy materials, the dolls are heavy. So they can be a pain to clean, maintain, and move around. They're also far from discreet. So, ensure you have a safe stash place when company calls.
Alternatives to full-body sex dolls are partial bodies.
These are often just the classic doggy-style ass for you to enjoy.
They either have one or two orifices for you to choose from, vaginal and anal. Some are adorned with tattoos and pubes, while others are just full bare ass.
You also have the option of the partial dolls with a torso attached. That way, you get the feeling and visual stimulation of bouncing boobs to enjoy during your experience. These are slightly easier to clean but are made by companies with questionable hygiene and safety standards. Not to mention the potential for slave labor involved in your sex toy. So choose wisely!
Of course, this wouldn't be complete without discussing blow-up sex dolls. These are, just as they sound, inflatable. So they're pretty discreet overall once you deflate them. Sometimes they'll have a masturbator included. Other times the whole thing will be made from traditional inflatable materials. Which is great if you have a beach ball fetish! But these are often just purchased for the novelty factor during bachelor parties.
Masturbators
These are the most common ways to shake up your masturbation routine.
Masturbators are sex toys meant to simulate a human orifice such as a vagina or anus. They come in countless varieties, such as plastic housing or pocket pussy form.
But they're composed of the same essential elements, mainly the sleeve used to bring your penis pleasure. If you're looking for new ways to masturbate, then a masturbator is definitely an investment you should make.
They also come in vibrating and non-vibrating options. So for a few extra bucks, your masturbator could do all the work for you! Some of them even sync up to your favorite porn, so you can really feel the actor or actress when they're moving. Your budget is your responsibility, so don't go beyond your means.
This falls into the gray area of porous vs. non-porous sex toys.
Masturbators are, 99.999% of the time, going to be made from porous materials.
That's because you want it to feel good and like you're having sex.
Porous materials are not all created equal. Specific brands such as Fleshlight have pioneered unique materials that are non-toxic and body-safe. This means that you can easily avoid the dreaded phthalates. Many of their products come in helpful bundles as well so you don’t have to worry about finding all the right bits and pieces.
When using a masturbator, ensure you know how to clean it before buying it.
You'll 100% need to invest in sex toy cleaning products and figure out where you can leave it to dry between uses.
Also, you'll definitely want some water-based lube to get the most out of your masturbator. Yes, water-based only. Water-based lubricants won't cause the material to degrade the way silicone or oil-based lubes will. Make sure you know what you're getting before you leave the shop! This three pack offers all water-based products including a normal lube, a warming one, as well as a cooling one!
If you’re bored of your masturbator and want to take things to the next level, I strongly suggest trying out the ArcWave by WowTech. It’s designed to take the pleasure engineering of the infamous Womanizer clit sucking vibrator and applying that tech to your penis. It’s made from medical grade silicone so cleaning is a breeze!
Cock rings
I could talk about cock rings all day long.
Cock rings are most commonly just a single circle of rubber or stretchy silicone. They're worn around either the base of your penis or behind your testicles.
They also come in countless varieties, such as vibrating to enhance your partner's pleasure. They can be app-controlled or hold your penis and testicles simultaneously!
There are many reasons to get a cock ring to add to your sex toy collection. Let me break it down for you:
Cock rings restrict the blood leaving your penis, so your erection is harder.
Because of the tightness, you'll delay orgasm. So if you have issues with early or unexpected ejaculation, these can be your best friend.
They can intensify your orgasm.
They make your penis look and feel bigger to your partner.
They make for great dick pics since they make your penis look more robust.
They're a perfect partner for your penis pump as they keep the erection you've worked so hard for.
So if you can find a reason not to spend $5 on a cock ring, let me know.
There are a few downsides to cock rings.
Such as buying the wrong size. This can easily be rectified by purchasing a set of various-sized cock rings.
Also, you should only wear them for about 30 minutes. They can lead to nerve damage to a man's best friend, so use them with care.
Often cock rings are still made from porous materials like synthetic composites. That's so they're stretchy, so it's fair. But it's worth the investment if you can get one made from body-safe or medical-grade silicone that fits you just right.
It’s safe to say that not all cock rings are create equally. If you’ve used and abused the typical stretchy silicone ones, you may be ready for the next step. We-Vibe (my pleasure product gateway drug) has come out with the Pivot cock ring. This sturdy, body-safe silicone helps you maintain an erection while pleasing your partner at the same time! You can also use the app to customize your shared pleasure experience.
Disposable masturbatory sleeves
These deserve their own honorable mention.
These are a new addition to the world of penis sex toys. Still, they are an excellent addition to your masturbatory routine.
Often found in adorable gumball-machine-sized balls, inside is a silicone composite sleeve. The inside is often ribbed or textured. They add new sensations to your solo sex routine without breaking the bank!
They usually run about $10 per sleeve.
But the bright side is that you can reuse them (but they are porous) or toss them when you're done.
These are my top recommended products for those who want to find a new way to masturbate. They're inexpensive and fun!
Plus, all the variations mean you have endless possibilities to choose from.
If you’re interested in purchasing a masturbator but don’t know where to start, try this egg variety pack from Tenga. They’re all body-safe and come in a variety of textures so you have a unique experience each time you reach for one!
Penis pumps
These are another wonder of the sex toy world. But penis pumps will not permanently make your penis longer or bigger.
That isn't a thing that can be done without surgery.
Many sitcoms joke about them, but they really do work. Penis pumps are simple, often affordable, and can help treat erectile dysfunction.
You can use a penis pump in 3 significant ways:
As a masturbatory experience - Some pumps come with a masturbator-like opening to experience pleasure while using it.
To help get an erection in the moment - When using a pump, keep your cock ring handy, so you can slide it on after you've gotten erect. This will help maintain your boner for longer!
Aid in erections for life - Sometimes, erections don't come easily, especially after surgery or other medical interference. If the muscles surrounding your penis and pelvic floor aren't maintained, it leads to erectile issues. Using a penis pump regularly over an extended time, can help you experience more reliable erections! Like the gym, this has to be done consistently to get results.
If you're unsure about how to use a penis pump, check out my full article here. Penis pumps are a powerful tool to help your penile health and strength, so don't discount them!
Penis sleeves
These aren't for a penis owner's pleasure but for the partner's. Essentially they're silicone-style sleeves that go on the top of your penis. They are commonly textured as well. So they add new sensations and additional girth to your penis!
If you want to buy a penis sleeve, make sure that you check that the product is:
Phthalate free
Has a strap to go behind the testicles, so it doesn't slip off
Doesn't cover the tip of your penis - you still want some sensation.
Unfortunately, there aren't many options for high-quality penis sleeves.
You're often stuck with something sticky and gross from the 90s.
I recommend avoiding these and finding something else to change your night.
Urethral sounds
These are not for the faint-hearted.
These are long, thin metal rods that are inserted into the urethral opening of the penis. Where you pee out of if you were unsure.
These are common tools for those interested in "watersports" or pee play. They're reported to also provide direct prostate stimulation, which can be a powerful new type of orgasm. If you haven't had a prostate orgasm, check out my article here.
But like I said, these are something other than a beginner's toy.
Getting the right size, weight, width, and texture can be a serious investment. And since they're going inside your body, please make this a serious investment. Only medical grade silicone or 100% stainless steel will do!
I don't want you taking risks with your body, please!
Anal toys for men
Anal toys have been a rapidly evolving sex toy market.
As anal play and eating ass have become more popular, these toy companies have been trying to keep up.
Whatever you're into, there's definitely a toy for that.
I'm mainly going to focus on the ones designed for your pleasure.
Douches & enemas
Obviously, we have to start with these. A douche and an enema are different.
A douche is usually a sizeable semi-firm bulb and has a plastic or silicone nozzle on the tip.
An enema has a separate bag (similar to a hot water bottle.) The bag is attached to a tube with a tip that gets inserted into the anus.
Douches are far more common and popular, but they're both for the same thing. They're designed to clean out your asshole before anal play.
To use a douche, first, empty your bowels.
Then, fill the bulb with warm (not hot) water.
Lube up the tip and squeeze the bulb slightly, so water starts to come out. Doing this helps you avoid getting air bubbles in your ass which is usually a good thing.
Insert the lubed-up tip into your ass and clamp those cheeks down. You'll have to wait for a few moments or minutes, but your body will let you know when it's time to let go.
Release the liquid from your backside into your toilet. Then check the water to see if it's clean.
If the water is clear enough, hop in the shower and prepare for a sexy, clean night!
If the water is murky or brown, then repeat the process.
You can repeat it up to 5 times safely. Just don't exceed that number. You may damage the lining of your anus if you douche too many times.
Please don't insert strange formulas into your backside without a doctor's approval. Things like coffee enemas have become more prevalent in these fad-cleanse diets. Your asshole doesn't need coffee. Just plain, warm water will clean you out just fine without disrupting your delicate lining.
Butt plugs
Ah, butt plugs.
Why aren't there enough good options on the market?
Adult store shelves are always lined with dozens of plug options. But, I'm often underwhelmed by the numbers. Finding butt plugs made from non-porous materials can be a real challenge. If I were you, I would continue to hunt until you found a non-porous one.
It's worth the journey.
Also, make sure it has an anchor or a flared base.
If your ass is given a chance, it'll pull just about anything inside it. And that makes for an awkward ER visit. If it doesn't have a flared base or some way to be pulled out, don't stick it in your butt.
Butt plugs often come in 3 main sizes. Small, medium, and large. You can choose a plug based on your preference for size.
Also, the shape is essential to consider. Some people like a pointer tip, whereas others like it when it's rounded. It's definitely a you-won't-know-till-you-try-them situation.
Also, the three sizes of plugs are ideal for anal training, which I've covered extensively in the past. Slowly moving up in size over time, your anus gets used to things being inserted into it. Also, when paired with typical masturbation patterns can become a pleasurable experience, even if you're scared to try it.
Butt plugs can be found in silicone, metal, and glass. All of these are great options for your anal play.
Personally, I love the Ditto from We-Vibe. It is perfectly designed for prostate pleasure without being an intimidating size. It has two separate motors designed to tempt both your prostate both outside and in. Talk about a blended orgasm!
If you’re looking for something simpler and more affordable, then check out Romp’s Bass vibrating butt plug. It’s easily rechargable and has 6 different intensity levels and 4 patterns for you to choose from!
Inflatable butt plugs also deserve mention here. They look similar to a butt plug but expand when you squeeze the attached pump. This expansion is great for those looking to move on to bigger and better things. But these can be a rather uncomfortable experience if you don't break the bank a little. So if you're investing in an inflatable butt plug, spend a little more. There is a better time to cheap out.
Prostate stimulators
When it comes to prostate toys, you have a lot of specific products. But the G-spot is the same place, just a different hole.
So, G-spot toys and P-spot toys can often be used interchangeably.
It needs a girthy handle that can't fit in your anal opening. Or if it has a clitoral arm on it. You need something to stop the vibrator from being pulled into the anal abyss.
Like all things with sex, prostate stimulation is a preference thing. Most men report that firm and consistent pressure is the best option. But, of course, there are vibrating and thrusting options for you as well.
With anything anal, spend a little extra coin here on safe materials.
After all, it is going into your anus.
If it is porous, then little fecal matter is permanently stored inside your prostate stimulator.
Not a great look.
Conclusion
That should be enough to get you started on your sex toy-buying adventure! There are so many types of male sex toys on the market it can be hard to choose just one.
But realize that you're investing in your pleasure and well-being. It's worth it to research and drop a few extra dollars. Especially when it comes to sex toys made from high-quality and body-safe materials.
So spoil yourself a little! If you want additional help choosing a sex toy, feel free to send me a message! I can help you select a suitable sex toy for you or your partner.
“The penis is always depicted as sufficient in itself, the genital equivalent of the Eye of Sauron.”
— Antonella Gambotto-Burke
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