The Importance of Great Sex | How sex is beneficial for your physical, mental, and relationship health
Let's be honest here; great sex is a real game-changer. It feels good, fun and brings you closer to your partner. But did you know that amazing sex is also important for your health and happiness? That's right, it's not just about getting your rocks off. Sex comes with many unbelievable benefits, such as reducing your risk of stroke or heart disease, helping reduce the symptoms of depression, improving communication between you and your partner, and so on.
So grab a snack and a drink, sit back, and let me teach you the health benefits of sex.
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What makes good sex great?
We all already know the answer here, great sex is entirely subjective. Meaning, what may be alright for one person, may blow their partner's mind. What makes sex great is up to you. But there are a few qualities that most people can agree on. A few things you should strive for when trying to have more great sex are:
Focusing on your partner's pleasure more than your own
You receive more (at least most of the time) when you give more. So spend your energy wisely focusing on your partner's body language and enjoyment. That will be repaid to you tenfold if you play your cards right.
Connection
Of course, you can have mind-blowing sex with a perfect stranger. Connection is like chemistry. It can be built over time or something raw, primal, and naturally occurring. When you have that sort of "spark" with someone, you're not just physically attracted to them. It's a raw animal magnetism of your body's craving for each other. That connection between strangers or spouses can take alright sex to fantastic sex.
Orgasm
Many people feel that sex isn't sex without the orgasm. Of course, I can't entirely agree. But if you want to go from good to great sex, then orgasm plays a pretty memorable and notable role.
Foreplay
You likely know I'm not a fan of the term "foreplay." In Sexology, we call it "sensual play" because it should come before sex, during sex, and even afterward. Sensual play can include kissing, massage, touch, playing with each other's bits and pieces, pouring wax, and anything that gets you in the mood! Extending and spending time on sensual play will make your sex unforgettable.
Countless things can make sex amazing, life-changing, and standard setting. To start having great sex, determine which sexual activities are significant to you and your partner. Then you can both begin prioritizing those in your sex practices.
Now that you know more about what makes sex great, let's learn about the health benefits of sex and why you should treat it like self-care.
Physical health benefits of sex
Yes, sex can be a great cardiovascular workout. Still, there are many more health benefits to sex than just working up a sexy sweat.
If you're trying to convince your partner to increase the frequency of sex in your relationship, try some of these points:
Release of endorphins and other feel-good hormones during sex
With incredible sex comes a rush of endorphins and feel-good hormones that warm the heart and the groin, leaving you feeling satisfied, desirable, and loved. But why are these endorphins in sex so important?
At the core of this rush are endorphins, oxytocin, and dopamine.
Endorphins are nature's painkillers. Not only can these help relieve your headache or period cramps, but they can produce feelings of relaxation and calmness.
That's why so many people talk about having make-up sex. They have released a significant amount of misplaced passion and feel a sense of closure and completion.
Oxytocin is the cuddle hormone. It increases the feeling of connection and intimacy with your partner. During sex and orgasm, heaps of oxytocin are released, bringing you closer to the person you're with and helping you bond.
Dopamine is the happiness hormone. You can get small doses of it from hugs, eating delicious food, or getting a truckload from having sex.
Dopamine is thought to play a critical part in the "depression equation." Those who don't reasonably produce enough dopamine often feel low and sad. But having sex more frequently can help mitigate the symptoms of depression with the dopamine released during sex.
Reduced risk of heart disease and stroke
That's right, you can help fight off a stroke by getting down to business. There are a few reasons for this. Primarily, it's the increase in blow flood and cardiovascular exercise that can make sex helpful for reducing your risk of heart disease and stroke. The release of endorphins we discussed is also beneficial in fighting these life-threatening health concerns. The reduction in stress and anxiety is caused by dopamine and oxytocin. Together, these lower blood pressure and help you maintain a heart-healthy regime!
Boosted immune system function
Sex has been shown to increase the production of antibodies. These proteins help your immune system stay strong and fight off pathogens such as bacteria, viruses, etc.
Because of the increased blood circulation, you also stimulate white blood cells, which can help fight dangerous diseases and infections.
These forces work together to help you stay healthy enough for a round 2!
Better quality of sleep
Sex helps reduce stress overall with the release of powerful endorphins and hormones. Because you feel more relaxed after sex, it's easier for the body and mind to rest and eventually fall (and stay) asleep.
That enhanced intimacy, connection, and trust with your partner in the post-o glow helps foster a sense of calm. Likewise, you've released tension with the physical and emotional expenditure of sex. This, combined with the pain-killing endorphins, will help your body relax and stay asleep.
While sex is a powerful sleep aid, it isn't a replacement for other sleep habits, such as having a sleep schedule and avoiding screens at bedtime. But it can help fill the gaps when you maintain a less-than-perfect nighttime routine.
Reduced risk of prostate cancer in men
That's right, regular sex can reduce the very cause of Movember. Prostate cancer is a silent killer of men. Still, by having more frequent sex (and practicing regular, healthy masturbation habits), you can reduce your risk of prostate cancer.
The prostate gland creates a fluid that gives semen (spunk, jizz, cum) its notorious white color. When that accumulates in the prostate and becomes stagnant, it can increase your risk of exposure to cancer-causing agents in the prostate.
The only treatment? Regular ejaculation.
How much sex is healthy for men? Research shows you should shoot to ejaculate about 5 times per week.
Prostatitis, or inflammation of the prostate, is incredibly common, especially in older men. Having an inflamed prostate increases the risk of prostate cancer. If you don't want to have prostate cancer and want to do all you can to prevent it, have sex more.
These aren't all the physical health benefits of having sex, but they are a solid start to your argument! There are even more mental health and relationship benefits to look forward to, so stay comfy!
Mental health benefits of sex
Ah, remember the last time you had great sex? Laying There, basking in the memory and moment, letting the post-o glow settle in. You crawl over to your partner for a cuddle; the sheets feel softer, the world brighter, and everything seems at peace. There's a lot more to it than just an orgasm; it's your brain and body rewarding you for having sex. And having regular sex can come with many more benefits than just an orgasm.
Reduced stress and anxiety
Scroll back up, skimmer, if you skipped the section on hormones and endorphins. Those endorphins and feel-good love hormones all help promote a greater sense of relaxation and stress. Endorphins help reduce your general pain, tiredness, or soreness. Meanwhile, oxytocin is there to help you feel loved and lovable. Then comes dopamine for the final addition to the post-sex snuggle puddle, there to help you feel happy, relaxed, and at ease. When these excellent natural depression deterrents come together, you'll feel more comfortable and better equipped to handle the anxiety and stress of daily life.
Improved mood and reduced symptoms of depression
As someone who has clinical depression, I can attest to this. Of course, I'm not suggesting that you should pressure yourself into having sex during a depressive episode. But if the mood strikes, maybe give it a go! The main reasons why sex helps those with depressive symptoms are:
Increased sense of self-confidence
Increased sense of self-worth
Production of dopamine
Production of oxytocin
Relaxing your anxiety spidey senses
So if you're suffering from depression and you're in a relationship, maybe try adding sex into your schedule with your partner. That way, you can get ready and excited for it rather than fighting off attempts at initiation regularly. Or, if you're single and want a reliable orgasmic source, try a vibrator, masturbator, or clit sucker to help you experience the best kind of natural depression-fighting medication you've ever experienced.
Enhanced self-esteem and body image
For those with poor self-esteem and negative body image, it may seem counterintuitive that sex can help. However, physical pleasure alone can help you relax and feel satisfied with your body's capabilities. That increased intimacy and connection with your partner can help you improve your body image and self-esteem by allowing you to feel accepted and appreciated.
Endorphins released from sex are natural mood boosters that come with the dopamine surge, which can positively affect your self-image.
You can also get positive feedback from your partner, which can help reinforce your positive feelings about your body.
It is important to note that sex should only be added to your self-care and mental health maintenance routine. It isn't a substitute for psychiatrist-prescribed medications, therapy, or coaching.
Reduced risk of cognitive decline in older adults
Sexual activity can help reduce your risk of cognitive decline in many ways. Most notably, the increased blood flow that you get from sex also happens to increase the blood flow in your brain. This can help nourish your brain and its cells to support cognitive function overall. (Hint, you should probably have sex before a test or big meeting for this reason!)
The hormonal effects of sex, like the release of testosterone and estrogen, can also help increase and complement brain activity.
Also, since sex helps enhance your immune function, improves your mood, and enables you to sleep better, these things can help you prevent cognitive decline as you age.
So consider adding sex into your self-care routine! Whether you're having solo sex or enjoying time with a partner (or more), sex can help your physical and mental health in many ways. But if you are in a relationship, there are many ways that sex can help support your relationship health overall.
Relationship benefits
Even maintenance sex is vital in a relationship. Not every sex session will be mind-blowing or life-altering. But sex is often a critical indicator and factor in overall relationship health. Perhaps you've been feeling a little distant from your partner and want to reconnect. Put sex on your shared schedule after a night of quality time together to bring things back together.
Increased intimacy and connection with a partner
The hormones and endorphins released during and after sex can play an essential role in developing a shared intimacy with your partner. Your brain rewards you for having sex in general, so why not use that as a reward in your relationship?
Please don't emphasize having the impossible shared orgasm moment together; instead, it comes from the experience as a whole. Suppose you're using sex to get closer to your partner. In that case, I suggest putting a big emphasis on foreplay or sensual play. By extending this period before, during, and after sex, you'll feel much closer to your partner and strengthen your bond.
Improved communication and trust in relationships
Sex is a time for honesty, shared laughter, and shared pleasure. However, communicating during sex may not come naturally. With some practice and finding out how to communicate during sex in a manner that works best for your relationship, it can translate into better communication overall between you both.
With improved manners of communication, you can trust each other better and bring your relationship closer. They say that the average American married couple has sex 52 times a year, so about once per week. If you're not hitting that mark, that's okay! Try to create time in your schedules at least for a half hour of cuddling and other types of physical intimacy so you continue to strengthen your physical intimacy bond.
Reduced risk of relationship dissatisfaction
What are the two leading causes of divorce? Sex and money. So if you're having frequent sex with your partner or spouse, you'll open new pathways for communication together. These will make it easier to talk about your sex life and even your finances. So, really, sex can help prevent divorce overall!
But real talk for a minute. Many people report being dissatisfied in their relationships because the sex "isn't what it used to be." if All you and your partner are having is maintenance sex, then no wonder! Amazing sex should be on the schedule at least a few times a year, Ideally once or more per month.
To really enhance your ability to enjoy the sexual experience together, try a few of these ideas out.
You need to relax.
So take care of your to-do- list ahead of time. Plan a date so you can unwind and enjoy each other's company.
You need to feel connected.
So do something that brings one of the other 5 types of intimacy into your date. Physicality is coming later, so consider how you can incorporate emotional closeness, spiritual intimacy, intellectual intimacy, or experiential intimacy into your evening.
Nothing in the way
Take a bath or shower together before you go to have sex. Use this as an opportunity to hug and hold each other and clean your bits thoroughly. When you're both clean, it opens new avenues of sexual exploration that seem much more approachable than if you didn't shower.
Don't skip the foreplay.
Again, sensual play is crucial to sexual satisfaction. So take the 10-15 minutes of non-genital stimulation and 10-15 minutes of indirect genital stimulation very seriously. Really draw out the experience and the arousal. Yes, the penetrative sex part may be shorter due to the anticipation. Still, you'll feel closer than ever before at the end.
So now you're healthier, happier, and closer to your partner than ever. All thanks to having great sex. The health benefits of sex don't stop here, but if these haven't convinced you, I'm not sure what will! 4
Safety considerations
Now, the health benefits of sex come with an important safety warning. If you want to have fantastic sex and get all the health benefits, you need to get your health ducks in a row, so to speak.
Remember to practice safer sex. That means you and your partner get tested regularly, using barrier methods when appropriate and some pregnancy prevention if relevant to you in this face of life.
Also, consent is crucial here. Not just an "oh fine, sure" kind of consent but a "fuck yeah, let's do it" kind. Enthusiasm and full participation are what take good sex to fantastic sex. So if you need to get enthused about sex, spend time with yourself to get yourself in the mental and physical space you need to really enjoy yourself
Conclusion
There are countless health benefits of sex, especially having sex regularly. Sex helps your physical health by releasing endorphins and hormones, improving blood flow, and helping fight certain cancers. Sex has a massive positive impact on your mental health by reducing stress and anxiety, improving your connection to your partner, and enhancing your self-esteem. And finally, sex with a partner brings you closer together, makes communication more straightforward, and can help improve your relationship satisfaction overall.
Having great sex starts with safety first. So get an STI test, use barrier methods, and speak with your healthcare provider about pregnancy prevention to ensure you can enjoy all the health benefits of sex.
“Some things are better than sex, and some are worse, but there’s nothing exactly like it.”
— W.C. Fields
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